A DINKs to DIOK to NITKs adventure. Excerpts of my to-be or not-to-be a parent (ever or again 😢) quest?

You probably got bewildered decoding the DINKs, DIOK and NITKs. But, believe me, living through them was no less of a baffling journey. Let’s get you introduced to these daunting terms first.

The DINKs phase (Double Income No Kids)

As with all new-age couples, we decided to enjoy our life following the motto: ‘Zindagi na Milegi Dobara’ (You only live once). Late night parties, driving 100s of kilometres for breakfast or just a cup of coffee, go Goas and what not! Thinking back, I marvel at the carefree and super-happening phase of our lives.

The DIOK phase (Double Income One Kid)

One fateful day, probably God got bored of seeing us behaving as wild owls and decided to put our lives back on the expected track. And, King Advitya made his way from the nowhere-land right into our arms. The feeling was blissful but of course, filled with a whole lot of uncertainties and insecurities.

The NITKs phase (No Income Two Kids)

It took a lot of effort and sacrifice of our happy-go-lucky life to get through the messy and forever demanding toddler phase of Advitya. No sooner than we were ready to get onboard on our planned DIOK-forever flight, God did a naughty winky wink again.

Poof!

The arrival of our Queen ‘Aarayna’ took away our Single-Kid title, and shocked us with ‘a Surprise’ of our lifetime. The fearsome CORONA pandemic stripped us of our double income luxury as well.

Expectedly, it took us a plentiful time (bewildered 6 months) to return to a minimal ‘Single income’ and yet another year to regain the ‘Double income’ title. We are hopeful that God doesn’t have another astonishment waiting in her kitty for us. Having said that, I must admit that we have enjoyed and have been strengthened by these perilously beautiful incomings.

Beautiful teacher life is, indeed!

From dreading the thought of losing the independence and financial luxury of being ‘the DINKs’ to living with two cute dependents and financial constraints of NITKs, life has taught us innumerable beautiful lessons all along the way.

Having no kids and two solid incomes is a dream that more and more young couples cherish these days. And, I totally and heartily recognise with their feelings. It has its own charm in the financial and personal independence, undivided attention and time for each other, placid holiday bookings, late nights, career heights, and what on.

As dreadful as it may seem, having a baby in the house, isn’t all that nightmarish. We learnt it when Advitya arrived. Of course, it came with the expected quota of frustrations, and occasional regrets of losing the DINK crown. Nonetheless, the feeling of being more than just a walking and talking meat, and to be able to create and nurture life was no less of a compensation. The tiny feet and cute giggles filled up a void in our nomadic lives, that we never knew even existed. Given the choice, I will choose to walk on the path again and again and be his mother with an ear to ear smile (with a little grin, of course).

To anyone contemplating parenthood, I would flash a big ‘YES’. Nonetheless, make sure that the decision to embark on the parenthood journey is fuelled by your emotional, physical, and financial background and not on peer or societal pressure.

From DIOK to NITK………….

Despite a constant hear hammering advice on the benefits of having two kids, we found perfection in our threesome adventure. We enjoyed seeing him grow one tiny inch at a time. His firsts were cherished, his scrapbooks and albums compiled with affection and passion. We travelled the world and enjoyed the spectre.

What would life be, if it goes on as per our desired plans? When we were planning to shift base to the UK and start a new inning of our lives, a missed period announced that we got another incoming. The interviews were postponed, resignations taken back with a complete surrender to the almighty’s will. I will not lie, but it was rather disheartening to be pregnant this time around. I loved the way my life and career was going at that moment, but it was all about to change.

BUT, the confusion faded with time and gave way to the love and sweet anticipation of the incoming star. Thankfully and amazingly, she did not let us down. Her arrival was a joy that I would never consent to give a miss. I will redo everything willingly that happened by chance the very first time. She filled the great corona void with endless joy and pleasure for everyone around her.

The modern-day complete family (cliched!)

Her presence made our small family complete (as they say and sounds lil cliche!). When I see the little monsters playing and happily engaged with one another, I regret the delay in bringing her in our arms sooner. Therefore, when they say that having two kids makes your life rather easier, taking off a lot of burden from your shoulders, it has a noteworthy undertone of truth attached to it (although, its not a hand-down winner for me). Now that I resumed my job and she is about to be two in a few months, all the toil seems worth the oil burnt.

I was happy single, happier married, happierrrrrrrr with Advitya but happiest with Advitya and Aarayna.

PS: I could never have been here, so hale and happy, without the unconditional support of my parents and parter-in-crime (the uber cool Mr Mahajan). I can never thank them enough!